“After five years of separation, a change in the law finally led us to divorce,” Japanese television personality and actress Maria Yamada, 46, told DW in late June, showing off her completed divorce certificate with a fresh smile.
She said, “I’ll turn in these papers next week – the custody boxes will be checked for both my husband and I – and it’s all done.”
Soon after, the mother of her 13-year-old son announced the completion of divorce proceedings from her actor husband, following the introduction of joint custody for divorced parents in Japan in April.
The popular couple’s timely divorce received widespread attention in the Japanese media, including major television networks and sports newspapers.
“My husband kept saying he didn’t want to lose custody of our son, but now he can finally accept the divorce,” Yamada said.
adopt joint custody
Before the new law, Japan was the only G7 country that awarded custody to only one parent after divorce.
Under the Revised Civil Code, parents with joint custody are required to discuss decisions that may significantly impact their child’s life, such as where the child lives and what school he or she attends.
When the parents themselves cannot agree, the family court determines custody based on the best interests of the child.
The law also allows parents who divorced before the reforms were implemented to apply to the court to change the existing sole custody arrangement to joint custody.
In case of domestic violence or abuse, the court will award sole custody to one of the parents.
Ignoring children’s voices
In Japan, where about 90% of divorces are settled by mutual agreement without court intervention and before April only sole custody was recognized, the interests of children have often taken a back seat after parents’ divorce.
A 26-year-old woman working in Tokyo, whose parents divorced when she and her younger sister were in elementary school, reflected that she struggled to understand when her father was given sole custody because of adult priorities such as financial stability, even though both children “felt very attached to the mother.”
“I always wished I could have lived with my mother,” she told DW. “Whenever I had to fill official documents, I could only write my father’s name as my parent.”
He felt a disconnect between the legal system and everyday life, as his mother continued to care for him after the divorce, including frequent dinners at his mother’s house. She remembers well that her younger sister was crying when she had to be separated from her mother.
“Looking back, I wish joint custody had been allowed at that time,” she said. “If children are old enough to have their own opinions, adults should not make these decisions on their own. They should also listen to what children want.”
Shinji Nozawa, a professor at Meiji Gakuin University in Tokyo who specializes in family sociology and stepfamily research, explained that after divorce children often lose touch not only with one parent, but also with that parent’s side of the family.
“In most cases, they can’t even see their grandparents anymore,” he said. “For a child, losing half the network of people who loved and cared for them is a huge problem.”
Nozawa said he understands that some single parents, the majority of whom are single mothers in Japan, find it stressful to remain connected with their former partner.
Nozawa said, “But this is often against the best interests of the child. In Japan, the discussion has not yet reached there.”
Divorce and international marriage
Seiya Sato, a lawyer specializing in Japanese family law at Setagaya International Law Office in Tokyo, told DW that the number of consultation cases about custody after divorce has been “increasing” since the introduction of joint custody.
He now receives five to ten inquiries a week, including international divorces. Many of his clients are fathers from America or Europe who are married to Japanese women. They are shocked to learn that under the Japanese system, only one parent may have custody while the other has little or no contact with the child, sometimes only being allowed to see them once a month.
As international marriage and divorce have become common in Japan, there has been increasing criticism of the country’s strange stance on parental responsibility. In 2020, the European Parliament warned that there were a large number of unresolved cases of child abduction by parents where one parent is an EU citizen, and the other a Japanese citizen.
It called on Japanese authorities to introduce the possibility of shared or joint custody, noting that Japan had joined the Hague Convention in 2014.
The United Nations Committee on the Rights of the Child has repeatedly recommended that Japan improve its implementation of the Convention on the Rights of the Child, which the country ratified in 1994.
According to Nozawa, taking a child away from the other parent is considered a crime in countries such as the US, whereas in Japan, its unique legal and social principles often result in those involved not considering their actions criminal, allowing the problem to persist.
“The introduction of joint custody is a step forward, but the system still leaves the decision largely in the hands of parents,” he said.
Can joint custody really work for children in Japan?
About 90% of single-parent families are headed by mothers, and it is common for them to bear the burden of raising their children alone.
Tomoko Taguchi, a 47-year-old single mother who has raised her three children on her own since divorcing her ex-husband seven years ago, is skeptical about the new joint custody system. He said this could blur parental responsibilities, including the obligation to support the child.
“It could end up with ex-partners giving opinions about the children but not financial support,” he told DW. “Someone who doesn’t share everyday parenting responsibilities shouldn’t be able to intervene in major decisions.”
Having shouldered most of the burden of child care even before the divorce, Taguchi works almost every day to support the household and pay for her children’s education – taking only one day off each month from part-time jobs at office work and a pizza delivery chain.
Her ex-husband pays only 100,000 yen (€540, $615) per month in child support.
One of the biggest problems with Japan’s system, Nozawa argued, is “the lack of a mechanism for the courts to actively intervene and ensure an arrangement that is in the best interests of the child.”
Edited by: Ole Tangen Jr.